Weird Bible Stories: in which we learn that God has some interesting ideas when it comes to capital punishment…

We’re staying in Genesis 19:

24 Then the Lord rained on Sodom and on Gomorrah brimstone and fire from the Lord out of the heavens.

25 He overthrew, destroyed, and ended those cities, and all the valley and all the inhabitants of the cities, and what grew on the ground.

26 But [Lot’s] wife looked back from behind him, and she became a pillar of salt.

Just as a reminder, in this chapter, we have Lot offering his teenage daughters to an angry mob to use as sex toys. The angels visiting his house don’t even pause and say, “Dude… what the heck? No… just… no…”

And a few verses later, we have Lot getting plastered and having sex with his teenage daughters.

For all of that, the writer of 2 Peter still calls him righteous.

But, if he had looked back at the fireworks display God was putting on, that was worthy of being turned into a pillar of salt.

I think we’ll visit a few more ‘interesting’ capital crimes in the Law next week.

Bible Family Values, Part 6: In which our nationalist author declares his hated ethnic rivals to be inbred bastards…

30 And Lot went up out of Zoar and dwelt in the mountain, and his two daughters with him, for he feared to dwell in Zoar; and he lived in a cave, he and his two daughters.

31 The elder said to the younger, Our father is aging, and there is not a man on earth to live with us in the customary way.

32 Come, let us make our father drunk with wine, and we will lie with him, so that we may preserve offspring (our race) through our father.

33 And they made their father drunk with wine that night, and the older went in and lay with her father; and he was not aware of it when she lay down or when she arose.

34 Then the next day the firstborn said to the younger, See here, I lay last night with my father; let us make him drunk with wine tonight also, and then you go in and lie with him, so that we may preserve offspring (our race) through our father.

35 And they made their father drunk with wine again that night, and the younger arose and lay with him; and he was not aware of it when she lay down or when she arose.

36 Thus both the daughters of Lot were with child by their father.

37 The older bore a son, and named him Moab [of a father]; he is the father of the Moabites to this day.

38 The younger also bore a son and named him Ben-ammi [son of my people]; he is the father of the Ammonites to this day.

You can almost feel the glee with which the author writes this passage about two of his nation’s hated ethnic enemies.

“Yeah, well, I’m writing the stories now, and I’m going to make you jerks inbred bastards born of drunken fornication!”

Anyway, with that, the story of Lot comes to an end, and gay marriage is looking much better than most of the relationships we’ve seen in the bible thus far.

Monday fun

Depression, anxiety, semi-compulsive thoughts about death and loss, acid reflux, a pervasive feeling that I’m doing a horrible job at work and raising my children, and a brain that seems to jump automatically to ‘worst-case scenario’ mode as the most likely scenario to happen.

Just another Monday. Weeeeeee!

(And no, it wasn’t any easier when I was self-medicating with alcohol. I still had all of those issues, plus an added anxiety that I was becoming an addict and would end up drinking myself to an early death.)

(Aslo no, it wasn’t any easier when I was a religious fundamentalist, except then I also had the pervasive fear that God hated me and was going to torture me forever because of thought crimes.)

Just something I have to deal with day to day. Keep moving forward.

Peddling fear to children…

From the Friendly Atheist:

How do you teach children about Hell?

If you’re evangelist C. Matthew McMahon, you just scare the shit out of them by introducing the concept of eternal damnation at the age of 5 with your new children’s book:

Remember, kids, God loves you, but he is going to torture you forever because an allegorical man and woman ate a piece of fruit He said not to. Now sleep well and try not to think about how you can die at any moment and end up on fire forever.

I think anyone who buys their kids that book should be automatically listed on a CPS watch list.

Bible Family Values: part 5: in which a patriarch offers up his daughters to be gang-raped by an angry mob

19 It was evening when the two angels came to Sodom. Lot was sitting at Sodom’s [city] gate. Seeing them, Lot rose up to meet them and bowed to the ground.

2 And he said, My lords, turn aside, I beg of you, into your servant’s house and spend the night and bathe your feet. Then you can arise early and go on your way. But they said, No, we will spend the night in the square.

3 [Lot] entreated and urged them greatly until they yielded and [with him] entered his house. And he made them a dinner [with drinking] and had unleavened bread which he baked, and they ate.

4 But before they lay down, the men of the city of Sodom, both young and old, all the men from every quarter, surrounded the house.

5 And they called to Lot and said, Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us, that we may know (be intimate with) them.

6 And Lot went out of the door to the men and shut the door after him

7 And said, I beg of you, my brothers, do not behave so wickedly.

8 Look now, I have two daughters who are virgins; let me, I beg of you, bring them out to you, and you can do as you please with them. But only do nothing to these men, for they have come under the protection of my roof.

Lot: Yes, angry and murderous mob, please take my two daughters and gang rape them all night, but leave my male guests alone.

Lot’s Daughters: Uh… wow… thanks, Dad?

Father of the Year, Lot was not.

Flash… AHAH…

Between this and the guy’s Superman fan cartoons he did a while back, I think someone needs to give this guy a job running an animated series.

Where I’m at…

I’m now 29 days into sobriety.

Not that I think I needed meetings, but I’m trying to get healthy again, and downing a bottle of wine a night just isn’t healthy.

Sleeping much better now. Instead of waking up every 2-3 hours, I sleep 6 hours and wake up. The quality is much better too. Getting a lot more dreams now, which reminds me of why I wanted to write. I might have to spend some time trying to restart my writing side career.

Anyway, the biggest difference is that I’ve noticed just how much TV sucks.

That said, I just finished watching Daredevil, which was really good. Brutal and well choreographed fight scenes. Pretty well-rounded characters who react like flawed people.

I’ve also still been keeping up with NCIS, The Flash, Arrow, Agents of SHIELD, An Idiot Abroad, The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Person of Interest, and It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

I gave up on Gotham and Scorpion.

I’ve been listening to Dan Carlin’s Hardcore History (Blueprint for Armageddon), Drunk Ex-Pastors, Doug Loves Movies, How did this get made?, History of WWII, History of the Papacy, British History Podcast, and Ancient Religions of the Mediterranean.

Still trying to get through Star Wars Episode II so I can do my next installment of Nerd Fight, but it’s… wow… it is really, really rough. It’s worse than I remember it being.

Anyway, hope all is well with ya’ll. I’ll post another round of Bible Family Values tomorrow along with anything else that catches my interest.