Nerd News Roundup


TMNT

If any of you have heard the words Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and thought that’s the movie we need more of, I’m pretty sure you and I can never be friends.

If you then heard the words Michael Bay is producing it and thought that sounded like a great idea, why do you hate all that is good in this world?

If you heard Megan Fox as April O’Neil and are still on board, I can only assume it’s because the blood is rushing south and you are no longer capable of critical thought.

Well, for those three of you, first of all, you suck and second of all, your stupid ninja turtles in this stupid (and unnecessary) remake by stupid Michael Bay are:

Alan Ritchson as Raphael

Leonardo – Pete Ploszak

Donatello – Jeremy Howard

Michaelangelo – Noel Fisher

I’ve only heard of Alan Rtichson because I was an idiot and watched Smallville for 8 of its ten seasons. And no, I can’t be bothered to IMDB the rest because I stopped caring about Michael Bay’s remakes of my childhood toy franchises when this happened:

Stop the madness, folks.

Stop the madness, folks.

Superman

Or Man of Steel. Lex Luthor might show up as a cameo or post-credit appearance.

Screenwriter David Goyer, who conceived his Man of Steel story with Christopher Nolan, sat down for an interview with I Am Rogue and was asked about the decision to leave Lex out of this incarnation of Superman’s story. But instead of explaining why, Goyer threw the journalist – and the Internet – a curveball.

“I don’t think anyone has every confirmed that we haven’t included him,” Goyer said.

Eventually Lex has to show up. I just hope he’s more evil CEO (that we’ve seen in the TV incarnations) and less real estate schemer with a penchant for being a gigolo that the movies have previously done.

Captain America:

Pleasing fans of the cult (read ridiculous) character, Latino Review reports that UFC fighter Georges St. Pierre will be bringing Batroc the Leaper to the big screen in the Captain America sequel.

Batroc, seen here. Not seen, dignity.

Batroc, seen here. Not seen, dignity.

Fun fact: Batroc, with his Pepe LePew American imitation of a French accent turned up to 11, is currently in the running with both Rogue and Gambit for the most ridiculous accent in comic books award.

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