Giving being underwater on your mortgage a whole new meaning…

So how’s the weather out there?

A new massive U.S. study says the world in 2012 sweltered with continued signs of climate change. Rising sea levels, snow melt, heat buildup in the oceans, and melting Arctic sea ice and Greenland ice sheets, all broke or nearly broke records, but temperatures only sneaked into the top 10…

Karl says surface temperatures haven’t risen in the last 10 years, but he notes that is only a blip in time due to natural variability. When looking at more scientifically meaningful time frames of 30 years, 50 years and more than 100 years, temperatures are rising quite a bit, Karl said. Since records have been kept in 1880, all 10 of the warmest years ever have been in the past 15 years, NOAA records show.

Hey, but at least it’s not affecting us down here in the States, right?

In the past eight decades, Louisiana has lost 1,880 square miles of coastal marshes, or an area about the size of Manhattan every year. With another hurricane season upon us, it is land that Louisiana and the nation can ill afford to lose. The same threat of lost barrier islands and wetlands stalks more than half of the coastal properties of the continental United States, extending from Maine to Texas. But here in southeastern Louisiana, it’s at its worst.

USA TODAY traveled to this place where the Mississippi meets the Gulf of Mexico as the sixth stop in a year-long series to explore places where climate change is changing lives.

“The sea is rising and the land is sinking,” says Louisiana state climatologist Barry Keim of Louisiana State University in Baton Rouge. “The two together mean that wetlands are disappearing here at unprecedented rates worldwide.” Add in the threat of more powerful hurricanes spurred by climate change, Keim says, “and you have to worry about the past repeating itself here.”

“Louisiana is in many ways, one of the best examples of starting to see some of the near-term implications of climate change,” says environmental policy expert Jordan Fischbach, of the Pardee RAND Graduate School in Pittsburgh, part of the team that last year developed tools for the state to decide what coastal restoration projects to pursue. “In some ways, I feel like it is the canary in the coal mine because they are seeing effects that change people’s day-to-day lives.”

Well, that tears it. If you ever want to go to another Mardi Gras, you best be writing letters to your local scientists (you’ll recognize them from the Ferraris they drive and the gaudy gold jewelry they wear) and tell them to knock it off with this whole Climate Change hoax now.

I’m telling you, assuming Jesus does come back, the first words out of His mouth will probably be, “Seriously, guys, I was gone for like just 2,000 years? It took like 8 billion years to make this place, how the blazes did you screw it all up so fast?”


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