Weird Wednesdays: Bears edition


Still working on the long rapture post. But a brief interlude in the meanwhile…

There were a lot of things that were capital crimes back in the Old Testament days. Some were what you’d expect: murder, adultery, idolatry, etc.

And some involved making fun of a preacher’s hairstyle or lack thereof:

23 Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up by the way, young lads came out from the city and mocked him and said to him, “Go up, you baldhead; go up, you baldhead!” 24 When he looked behind him and saw them, he cursed them in the name of the Lord. Then two female bears came out of the woods and tore up forty-two lads of their number. 25 He went from there to Mount Carmel, and from there he returned to Samaria.

Elisha wasn’t a turn the other cheek sort of fellow. No, he was an Old Testament kind of guy who got mentored by an even more Old Testament kind of guy, Elijah. Elijah was the rather metal fellow who slaughtered rival priests and incinerated two platoons of 50 soldiers who had been ordered to bring him to meet the king. So you know his disciple isn’t going to go for the whole “love your enemies” or “Bless those that curse you” kind of New Testament hippy stuff.

So when a pack of teens comes out and makes fun of his lack of hair, Elisha brings out the bears. To kill them all. And presumably eat them.

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Seems really harsh for a bit of mocking, I know, but Sunday School would have been so much more awesome if they had taught us the bear summoning spell.

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