Movie reviews for parents who don’t get out to the movies: Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice


I haven’t done this feature in a while, but this movie deserves a write up, I suppose.

Truth be told, I liked Man of Steel the first time I saw it. It was not a perfect movie, by any means, but it was enjoyable on the whole provided I didn’t think that much about what would really happen if two supermen were to fight amongst populated buildings in downtown DC’s New York analog.

So I was looking forward to the sequel where they might… just might… take some of the criticisms of the first movie into account and craft a better Superman story.

Instead, we got Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice. Spoilers follow.

Being on the internet for as long as I have, I’ve heard all sorts of criticism of this movie, and most of it is true, but a lot of the vitriol behind those criticisms seems unworthy.

Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice just doesn’t deserve that level of emotion because it doesn’t earn it. It doesn’t earn any emotions really.

For the movie’s greatest sin isn’t turning Batman into a deranged homicidal vigilante or Superman into a joyless mope who is almost a secondary player in his own sequel or Doomsday into a retreat of 2008’s the Incredible Hulk’s Abomination, or the plot holes, the unanswered questions regarding superpowered vigilantes and how they should be treated by people and the government, Jesse Eisenberg’s curious acting choices playing Lex Luthor, or the resolution of the titular character’s pointless conflict based on having a mother with the same name.

The problem isn’t even Batman’s fever dreams of a future where Superman is tyrant of the world.

The movie’s greatest sin is that it is all dreadfully dull.

Zach Snyder and Warner Brothers have managed to take a bright vibrant comic book universe with over the top action and turn it into a movie where I was frequently checking how much time was left on the Blu-Ray.

pg-16-batman-superman-1

“Pointless conflict… pointless conflict… I’m going to murder you… Your mom has the same name as my mom? SQUUUUEEEEEEEE! Besties!” – There I just save you three hours of your life.

It wasn’t a horrible movie, it wasn’t a good movie, it was… just sort of there. The type of movie I might turn on as background noise if I wanted to do housework or workout, but not something I would actively pay attention to and not a movie that demands I pay attention to it.

Even during the finale in which Doomsday faces off against Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman, I was asking myself, “Is this it?”

Well, no, it isn’t it, because the ending sets up the inevitable sequel where Justice must be Dawned or something, and I just don’t care.

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Movie reviews for parents who don’t get out to the movies: Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s