Category Archives: Government

We are very pro-life here…


Welcome to America.

We are very pro-life here.

Mind the bodies. COVID, you know… nothing to be done. Mandates? No, here we encourage people to do their own research on Infowars.

But we very much believe in the sanctity of life.

Kindly, keep your gaze from the ghosts on the right. They perished from the guns we make and sell. Many find their accusatory stares of the children to be discomfiting.

Personally, I don’t get it. There’s nothing we could do to stop it.

Every human life is precious and created in the image of God.

To your left, you’ll see the gallows where criminals are executed.

Yes, sir, unlike those godless countries, we value human beings.

Those? Oh, those are the ghosts of people who were killed by our police.

Guess they should have complied, am I right?

Every child is precious to us.

To your right, you’ll see the cemetery where the war dead are buried. It’s quite large.

We’re adding more space every day.

But life is precious to us.

Mind the hungry moochers over there. No, giving them anything to eat will just make them lazy and entitled.

Some people just don’t want to work for a living.

Yes, we love God and we love life here.

The impeachment of Donald Trump… How we got here: A helpful timeline.


11-2016: Donald Trump gets elected President.

1-2017: Donald Trump is inaugrated. He kicks off his presidency and it’s long list of lies by lying about how many people showed up.
Some Democratic voters: We should impeach the bastard!

Democratic leaders. Come on, guys, he hasn’t done anything yet. Let’s give him a chance and just focus on trying to make the best of things and get ready for 2018.

5-2017: Mueller investigation starts. James Comey is fired to put a stop to it.

Democratic voters: Okay, how can we impeach the bastard?
Democratic leaders: Let’s investigate the matter first.
Republicans: Eh… we really don’t want to.

11-2018: Democratic voters: Okay, you have a majority in the House now. Can you start really investigating the whole Mueller thing now?

Democratic leaders: Okay. But we’re going to be nice, slow, and deliberative.
Democratic voters: Ugggggh… why do you have to be so… responsible, damn it!?!

4-2019: Mueller report drops.
Bill Barr: Complete Exoneration.
Donald Trump: Complete Exoneration.
Democratic leaders and voters: That’s not what it says. We can read, you know.
Mueller: Yeah, that’s not at all what I said.
Republicans: COMPLETE EXONERATION! LALALALALALALAL!
Democratic voters: Impeach now?
Democratic leaders: Shh… let us investigate more. You guys start getting ready for 2020, okay?
Trump: 2020, you say? Hmm…

9-2019: Whistleblower complaint.
Whistleblower: Holy ****, everyone. The President tried to bribe the President of Ukraine to go on CNN and help him rig the 2020 election.
Trump: Read the transcript!
(Everyone reads transcript)
Democratic voters: You tried to bribe the President of Ukraine to go on CNN and help you rig the 2020 election.
Trump: Read the transcript!
Democratic leaders: You tried to bribe the President of Ukraine to go on CNN and help you rig the 2020 election.
Trump: Read the Transcript!
Republicans: That’s not what it says, and even if it does say that, he didn’t do it, and if he did it, he didn’t understand what he was doing, anyway, it’s not illegal, it’s completely normal!
Unlike lying about a blow job.

11-2019: Impeachment inquiry

Democratic leaders: Sigh… I guess we have no choice. Did Donald Trump do the shit?
Witnesses under oath: Yeah, he did the shit.
Republicans: I like paste!
Trump: TRANSCRIPT! SHIFTY SCHIFF! ARGLE BARGLE!!!
Republicans: Sigh… such leadership!


12-18-2019:

Democratic leaders: Well, shit… I guess we’ve got no choice. This idiot actually did try to bribe a foreign government to help him rig the election. Impeach him.
Democratic voters: Finally!
Republicans: YOU JUST WANT TO UNDO THE 2016 ELECTION! YOU’VE ALWAYS WANTED TO IMPEACH HIM!
Some Democratic voters: Well, yeah, he’s a stupid corrupt assclown and a criminal.
Democratic leaders: Uh… have you guys actually met us? We’ve been dragging our feet on this shit for a year now. It’s not our fault he’s so stupid he tried to bribe a foreign leader to help him rig an election.

 

“Well, you see, when He said, ‘the least of these’ He really meant…”


Please, Trump voters and Evangelicals, tell me again how Trump is a moral person.

Tell me how Christian he is, guys.

Tell me how Jesus approves of this.

I dare you. I double dog dare you…

One Nation Under God…


If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

Sessions

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.

AP_17159386154465-1040-1024x683Trump arms sales161027154000-01-yemen-starvation-1027-restricted-exlarge-169

If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Trump Charity

Love is patient, love is kind.

ct-central-american-us-border-crossing-photos-20180613

It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

Trump boaststrump boast 2

It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil 

steveking

but rejoices with the truth.

trump-lies1

It always protects,

chi-immigration-border-wre0073544841-20180613

yemen

always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

The Trump-Kim talks


I don’t get political here as much anymore, but someone claiming to be a time traveler sent me a small clip from an audio file… and, well, if you live in Hawaii, you should probably consider moving to the mainland.

Trump: Kimmy, may I call you, Kimmy?
Kim: No. And may I say what large and impressive hands you have, Mr. President.
Trump: Thank you, Kimmy, I’m glad you noticed. Now look, we can’t have you building nukes that can hit America. Some of my voters live there.
Kim: Okay, we will stop new ICBM tests. (Because we’re confident in our existing supply.)
Trump: That is great news.
Kim: In exchange, we would like a formal end to the Korean war and the withdraw of your troops from the Demilitarized Zone.
Trump: I think we can do that. What about nuclear tests?
Kim: We will suspend nuclear tests. (Because our testing site collapsed.)
Trump: You are a great man. What can we do for you?
Kim: Renewed economic aid.
Trump: Done.
Kim: And lastly, we put the great name of Trump on our tallest, most impressive hotel, the Ryugyong Hotel that stands majestically over Pyongyang.
Trump: I knew you were okay. Everyone else tried to tell me you were a bad man, but I said, “I know Kimmy is a good guy. Great guy.”
Kim: Thank you, Mr. President. We would also like Hawaii.
Trump: Deal. It’s not even a part of the United States.

A helpful primer for Christians regarding SCOTUS’ decision today…


So what happened today?

The Supreme Court has legalized gay marriage today in a 5-4 decision that applies to all 50 states. Meaning that gay people can now marry one another anywhere in the country.

So what does this mean for me? 

Honestly? Probably nothing. I’m assuming if you’re a Christian concerned about this ruling that you’re not gay, so it doesn’t really affect you at all.

So this doesn’t invalidate my marriage?

Nope. You’re still married.

But isn’t my marriage less special now? 

Is it? Do you still love your spouse?

Yeah. 

Then no. You’re marriage is the same as it was yesterday.

But what about religious liberty? 

What about it?

Isn’t the gay agenda going to force all Christians to accept their lifestyle and outlaw the bible and preaching that homosexuality is a sin from the pulpit as ‘hate’ speech? 

Okay, first, I would guess that most gay people aren’t evil monsters out to destroy you personally. Second, you mention religious liberty, so you’ve obviously heard of the First Amendment, which would prohibit any attempt by the government (Federal, State, or Local) to suppress you or your pastor’s ability to call being gay a sin all day long.

Now, that won’t stop gay people from saying that your insistence on saying that makes you a bigot, because that is also personal speech protected by the 1st Amendment.

I’m not sure I like that.

Well, then you probably shouldn’t go around telling random gay strangers that they are depraved sinners.

What about my church or my church’s school? Will they be forced to hire gay people and offer benefits to gay spouses? 

Are they forced to hire gay people now?

No.

There’s you’re answer. The courts have typically given religious institutions a great deal of latitude when it comes to who they hire. Typically, the employees must agree with a statement of faith and conduct. If you’re church or church school doesn’t want to hire gay people, they don’t really have to.

Where the law gets a bit murky is if a religious institution is running a for-profit business that serves the general public or runs a service that accepts state or Federal funds. In those cases, you may be held to existing anti-discrimination statutes by the courts.

Well… what if I own a business like a bakery and a gay couple want to buy a wedding cake? 

Personally, my answer would be to bake them the cake, go to the wedding if they invite you, hug them, dance with them, wish them the best, befriend the couple, and when you’ve earned the right to do so, then you can bring up your faith.

I’m not sure Jesus would approve of that. 

Jesus was constantly accused of hanging out with sinners, prostitutes, and traitorous tax collectors that defrauded the people. He was also accused of loving wine a bit too much. Even if Jesus thinks that gay folks are sinners, I’m sure he’d understand.

What if I still don’t feel comfortable baking that cake? 

One answer is that you should do it because it’s your job. And part of that job is serving all customers under the law regardless of race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, or creeds.

Another answer is which would you rather you and your faith be known as, the person who said “No because your love and marriage are sinful and God will judge you” or the person who bakes the best damn cake ever, greets them with a smile, and hugs them?

Yet another answer would be to ask why you don’t feel comfortable doing that? Is it just because the customers are gay? Would you a heterosexual divorcee’s second wedding? Would it occur to you to ask them about their past marital status?

But I don’t like the government telling me I have to cater their wedding! 

I don’t like speed laws or paying taxes. It’s the price we pay to live in a civilized society. So render to Caesar and all that.

Okay, but what about Sodom and Gomorrah and fire and brimstone and all that?

Somehow if God didn’t destroy America for slavery, ethnic cleansing, Jim Crow and the “strange fruit” of Southern trees, Imperialistic violence and massacres in the Philippines, rampant gun violence, and hell, let’s throw in the Iraq War, I think we’ll be okay now that Adam and Steve can say, “I do.”

Relax.

So, there’s really nothing in this ruling that affects me? 

Nope. Not at all.

Then why is everyone so angry? 

Beats me. Probably fear of change. Politicians using fear to con people into giving them money or to distract them from realizing how badly we’re all getting screwed by the constant collaboration between corporations and governments, but that’s just my guess.

So, uh… how about those Dodgers? 

I’m an Angels fan.

I’m so sorry. 

Yeah, me too.

Cut the damn defense budget…


We spend more on defense than the next nine countries combined and this is the best we can do?

The F-35 program has become something of a dark comedy. Yes, it has huge fiscal and national security implications, but sometimes you just have to laugh at how big of a fumbling mess it really is.

Not only has the jet itself been plagued by the absolutely shattered concept of ‘concurrency’ (building something en masse even before testing it), but as it turns out, some of its support infrastructure was too. This includes the 45,000 ton displacement USS America.

The $6.8 billion aircraft carrier ($3.4 billion unit cost) — and that is what it is, an aircraft carrier, not a amphibious assault ship — was commissioned last fall to great fanfare, yet now we learn it will be heading in to dry dock for almost a year.

Why, you ask? Is there a defect with the ship’s weapon systems? A propulsion or hull issue? Hardly, the class was actually based on the latest Wasp Class vessels, which in itself is troubling considering the America Class’s much higher cost.

Instead it will receive myriad patchwork upgrades aimed at allowing it to operate the F-35B. Yep, you read that correctly, the same aircraft, along with the MV-22 Osprey, that the ship was specifically designed to accommodate, can’t operate from its decks.

Banana Republic isn’t just a store in the mall


I recall when we used to drive down periodically to Mexico, that we’d be warned to avoid the Federalies and carry a bit of extra cash to ‘gift’ them with if they stopped us.

Guess we should probably start doing that for cross country road trips in case we run into cops like this.

If someone with a gun stops you and takes your money — would you call police? What if the person who takes your money also has a badge? 

Some people in Humboldt County, tongue-in-cheek, call it “highway robbery.”

One deputy in particular is being singled out for his practice of pressuring travelers to abandon their money or face losing their cars as well. The I-Team has obtained exclusive dash-cam video from one of these drug interdiction stops. While no drugs were found, that didn’t stop the deputy from grabbing the cash.

“How much money you got?” Humboldt County Deputy Lee Dove can be heard asking on the video.

Dove can be seen dropping cash on the hood of the car. 

Deputy Dove: “That’s not yours, is it?”
Motorist: “That’s mine.”
Deputy Dove: “Well, I’m seizing it.”

The dash-cam video gives insight into what some say is a pattern of questionable drug interdiction stops by Deputy Dove along I-80 near Winnemucca in northern Nevada.

The out-of-state motorist was stopped for doing 78 mph in an 75 mph zone. Deputy Dove finds $50,000 cash and $10,000 in cashiers checks during a search of the car.

The first issue is whether Dove obtained permission to search the car or whether he simply told the driver, Tan Nguyen, he was going to do it.

Deputy Dove: “Well, I’m gonna search that vehicle first, ok?”
Nguyen: “Hey, what’s the reason you’re searching my car?”
Deputy Dove: “Because I’m talking to you … well, no, I don’t have to explain that to you. I’m not going to explain that to you, but I am gonna put my drug dog on that (pointing to money). If my dog alerts, I’m seizing the money. You can try to get it back but you’re not.”
Nguyen: (inaudible) got it in Vegas.”
Deputy Dove: “Good luck proving it. Good luck proving it. You’ll burn it up in attorney fees before we give it back to you.”

But Dove never seizes the money under state forfeiture law, instead he offers Nguyen a deal. Abandon the cash and you can leave with the cashiers checks. Otherwise, Dove will confiscate the cash anyway and tow the car because Nguyen’s name isn’t on the rental agreement.

Deputy Dove: “It’s your call. If you want to walk away, you can take the cashiers checks, the car and everything and you can bolt and you’re on your way. But you’re gonna be walking away from this money and abandoning it.

“Our sheriff and our DA have said there’s no wrongdoing here,” said Dee Holzel.

Of course there isn’t. Though, somehow I doubt you’d feel the same way if Mr. Nguyen had been accosted outside of a casino by an armed guy in a suit who asked Nguyen to leave his cash with him or else he’d be in for a load of pain.

Hard to see what the difference between that scenario and this one is.

 

Random thoughts


– The NBA didn’t really have a choice with Donald Sterling. No large business trying to appeal to customers and top talent is going to tolerate racial bigotry. They needed to show nervous sponsors, angry players, and shocked customers that they would take this seriously and they did,

Also, I’m sure the folks who were outraged by the Eich incident at Mozilla will be stepping up to defend Mr. Sterling any day now… any day now… (crickets)

– Someone posted a response to me over at io9 and it so captured my own thoughts that I’m going to post it with permission here:

One of the tools I use when talking to biblical Literalists is to ask them to imagine Moses (who is considered to be the author of Genesis by Literalists), being told by God about the formation of the universe.

“Okay Moses, I’m going to explain to you how the world came to be. So, in the beginning, I caused a point of near-infinite mass to appear within the quantum foam.”

“Lord, I am but a small being and it is presumptuous of me to ask a question of you, but what is quantum foam, and what is infinity?”

“Moses, this doesn’t matter all that much, but since I am telling you the accurate way in which the world came to be, I will explain. The quantum foam is the underlying probabalistic state of the universe beneath the level of quarks and other subatomic particles.”\

“Lord, I know I am but a small being, but allow me another question. What is an atom, and what is probability?”

“Moses. This… this doesn’t really matter. Okay. The atom is the fundamental building block of matter. All things you see about you are created of atoms. There are other things besides atoms, but… well, just say that they are made of atoms. That’s close enough. So, as I was saying, after I-”

“Lord, forgive my interruption, for I am but as dust beneath the soles of your shoes, but this concept of an atom. What does one look like? How shall I describe it?”

“I… Its a cloud, Moses. Like me. A cloud of electrons that surrounds the central nucleus like… like… like how the bird goes around its nest, or the earth goes around the sun.”

“Lord, I am as nothing before you. Did you say that the earth goes around the sun? How does that work?”

“That… that’s skipping ahead. That involves gravity which. No, Moses, don’t ask what gravity is. That’s complicated. I doubt anyone for millenia will even be able to comprehend what that might actually be. I… Okay, look. This isn’t working. I can’t explain all of the workings of the universe for you to put into your book. New plan. I’m going to tell you a story. An allegorical story about how I created the world in only six days, and what my relationship is to it and to humanity. I hope nobody centuries from now assumes that this is factual for some bizarre reason. Okay. Start writing. In the beginning…”

– The crimes the men are accused of are horrific, but I’m not sure how anyone who is pro-life could possibly be comfortable with this, and that’s not even touching on the hundreds of folks who have been acquitted via Project Innocence and other lawyers working tirelessly on behalf of innocent convicted clients.

– Hey, you know how in Iraq, there are armed bands of extremists who set up checkpoints in neighborhoods and terrorize the populace while making threats against the civil authorities all in the name of their fundamentalist perverse ideology?

Yeah, we’ve got that here too.

The militia, as reported by Horsford’s constituents, “have set up checkpoints where residents are required to prove they live in the area before being allowed to pass,” the letter said.

They have also maintained a presence, sometimes armed, along highways and roads, as well as community sites like churches and schools, the letter asserted.

Whiskey Rebellion

Riding in at the head of an army… I wonder what Fox News would say about that? Probably call Washington a tyrant socialist oppressor. 

How would the Founders respond? Hmm…

theol

A thing of beauty…


Here.

Side topic: it’s funny how few people have heard of the Whiskey Rebellion. Or maybe it’s just funny to me as a US history nerd.