Category Archives: Christianity

A Tale of Two Countries…


The king was a vain, insecure man. A vicious brute who would last out and murder his critics. A small man trying to be big. He built monuments to himself and his glory.

And when the Kingdom of Heaven was at his doorstep, challenging his insecurities, calling him to a better path, he did what all small, insecure men do, he bullied the weak, the powerless, and the helpless.

He stole their children.

16 Then Herod, when he saw that he was deceived by the wise men, was exceedingly angry; and he sent forth and put to death all the male children who were in Bethlehem and in all its districts, from two years old and under, according to the time which he had determined from the wise men. 17 Then was fulfilled what was spoken by Jeremiah the prophet, saying:

18 “A voice was heard in Ramah,
Lamentation, weeping, and great mourning,
Rachel weeping for her children,
Refusing to be comforted,
Because they are no more.”

The Kingdom of Heaven, if there is such a thing anymore, still calls out. It still stands on the doorstep. It still challenges venal, insecure brutes to let go and act to help the weak, the powerless, and the helpless.

And wicked tyrants still lash out at the vulnerable.

So it goes…

But please, do tell me of your good Christian virtues and how God anointed this pathetic waste of a human soul to lead this country to ‘greatness’.

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One Nation Under God…


If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

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If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.

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If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Trump Charity

Love is patient, love is kind.

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It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

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It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil 

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but rejoices with the truth.

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It always protects,

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always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

Your Religious Dictionary: Worship


Worship: The act of telling an entirely self-sufficient God how great he is like he’s been a bit depressed lately and needs a rousing pick me up.

Your Religious Dictionary: Charismatic


Charismatic: a faction of Christianity where everyone pretends to be a D&D Cleric with divine magic powers that they don’t use to heal everyone in the local Children’s hospital for some reason.

An Infidel Reads the Quran: Surah 39: Throngs – Thoughts about Hell…


Look… it’s the same as pretty much every other Surah we’ve read so far.

  • God totally gave me this book, I didn’t just pull it out of my ass.
  • Unbelievers are evil, wicked people who will burn in hell forever and ever.
  • Believers get a nice reward for following the right religion.

So instead of repeating myself and my jokes for 70+ verses, I’m going to talk freely about something that I talked about when I dealt with the fundamentalist Christian interpretation of the bible.

God, as depicted in these books or interpretations of these books is objectively evil.

Or to borrow from geek terminology, the fundamentalist interpretation of God is a Lawful Evil tyrant.

He sits on the throne. He makes the rules. If you follow the rules and suck up to him, He rewards you. If you don’t follow the rules, even break a single rule, He murders you. Then he brings you back to life because killing is too merciful for the likes of you, then He locks you into a basement and tortures you forever without hope of death, escape, respite, or future mercy.

This isn’t a God to be loved.

This isn’t a Father to be adored and respected.

This is a monster to be feared and obeyed.

This is Sauron.

This is Stalin minus the magical resurrection powers.

If I walked up to you and said, “You will love me and do exactly what I say or I will lock you in a shed and torture you until you die of natural causes” I would rightly be considered a monster if I were serious.

But somehow if God does that, He’s a loving and merciful being for offering us a way to get out of what he’s going to do to us if we don’t get on his good side?

No, I’m sorry, but that’s not consistent. That’s abusive and evil.

But He’s God and He’s in charge.

Then He’s a wicked tyrant, and if you believe that, then I suppose it makes sense to get on his good side. But you’ll be living in fear forever. Sure you have heaven or you have a very pretty garden, but you’re under the rule of someone who will torture you forever if you break the rules.

“Oh, but I won’t want to break the rules in heaven.”

Then you won’t have free will and you will be a puppet in the hands of an evil tyrant forever.

Hell only makes sense if we are unfortunate enough to be the creation of a wicked tyrant.

Religion and guns…


Look, I don’t want to get into the philosophical debate of self-defense and whether or not such a thing is permissible to Christians. There are many words written on that discussion already.

 

All I want to say is that even if you have the right to own all of the guns you want, maybe ‘humbling yourself’ and ‘loving your neighbor’ might entail being willing to have limits on your rights so your neighbors don’t have to bury their children.

 

And maybe that impulse to object and say, “But my rights!” is a part of the old human nature?

 

Just something to think about, Christians.

Your Religious Dictionary: The Rapture


The Rapture: A belief among certain Evangelical Christians that one day soon, God will  reward his most fanatical and devoted followers by taking them off of the Earth and whisking them away to heaven.

For some reason, they see this as a bad thing for the rest of us who are left behind.